Archive for the ‘Feel Good: Mind’ Category
One of the things I have found to be tried and true in the life of training to be a Fit Mom, is that I can fit my kids into my fitness NO MATTER what age they are. The other thing I found to be tried and true fact is that you can do anything you want, but you can’t all of it right now, a common disappointment to those of us who want to rush it all and do it all, like the commonly over-achieving Fit Mom tends to attempt to do.
Fit Moms have a nack for balancing tons at once- we are the ultimate multi-taskers. We don’t need to be reminded to go to the gym, or to take care of our children, to balance checks, pay bills, stay motivated to work hard, or things that we are known for our brilliant management of.
However, it’s important to our health that we remember the soothers in life, as these are the things that will keep us capable of our most awesome of awesomeness for the long term, while also helping us stay sane and even happy. After all, happiness is the whole point of living, right? The two main things we fit moms tend to neglect, but can stand to pay more attention to are:
- Rest- Sleep is necessary for our bodies (muscles and organs) to recouperate, and that recouperation is when our recovery from usage takes place. Sleeping 6-8 hours nightly is often difficult for us to force ourselves to do. When people don’t sleep enough, we burn out our health, and lose our patience easier. Keeping it all together for the long term requires proper sleep. For without proper recovery, we can cause health risks and moodiness that make it impossible to enjoy our lives.
“Sleep deprivation has been proven to lead to… weight gain… increases in inuslin resistance (which leads to diabetes)…” says Dr. Ann E. Rogers, who has studied the effects of sleep with test subject groups and individuals.
- Affection- Being adored, adoring ourselves, and adoring others amps the “yippee” chemicals in our brain. Whoever said a cocktail was the only way to wind down and smile at the end of a long day? Taking the time to hold our children, our companions, or our friends & family for long embraces actually stimulates the secretion of endorphines, which lead our brains and bodies to experience joy. ASU’s Associate Professor, Kory Floyd, has studied the effects of affection extensively. People’s organ capabilities, blood pressure, weight management, and overall health can be managed better with affectionate behavior.
“Affection can be a simple, non-pharmaceutical, cheap way to reduce stress.” Floyd has found that there are direct associations between being an affectionate person and a lower risk of depression and stress.
Thus we see that no matter how healthy we eat, how much we exercise, how much we extend to our children, and no matter how many tasks of responsibility we cover in our daily lives, we could be actually limiting ourselves, and our years, if we are not taking care to rest and embrace on a daily basis as well! Sleep and Love, life’s combo remedy to help longevity!
Enjoy & Empower! Be PHENOMENAL! You are Worth the Work!
smashing out the old drab hues
brighten with enlightened dues
refuse to be so broken used
standing in results i choose
there i am but there she went
she served a mission heaven sent
here i stand and pose with love
rich in heart with will to shove
shoving out that mass of pain
select outside what’s mundane
from the hatefulness refrained
i choose to be a soul regained
a clarity besets my thoughts
what shall i buy, not will be bought
the doubt dissolves as we forgot
remembering what strength has wrought
avail to me right now i claim
the riches of my children’s name
see the signs and live the times
sing the songs of hearts and minds
destiny is not resigned
for now our stars are realigned
and as we held hands all this while
my family’s souls only smile
smile on us, angels do
only in our tickled view
for as we feel and laugh in deed
integrity and passions lead
leading us to golden roads
lit and paved with seeds we sowed
lifting us with lighter loads
and gifting us as our will flowed
worship thankfully in hopes
while toiling to untie ropes
and now the picture becomes real
we manifested what we feel
- Nita Lee Marquez
IFBB Pro Fitness Athlete, Author/Speaker/Poet
Miss National Fitness, Fit Mom, Fitness Model
Embarking on a new song sent
Wondering what moments meant
Elated by a hopeful gent
Gentle like a power bent
Bend the mends that closed the shade
End the rendered pain’s charade
Gallantly we stand on faith
Bringing us to heaven’s gates…
Heaven’s calls do relegate
Beyond what heathens delegate
We take on knowledge to create
A manifested vision’s state
There we go and here we stand
Tempest was an old remand
Bow to a forceful, truthful light
I am that forceful in my might
Now I see what all that meant
No need for my heart to resent
For thereupon their need repents
For naught what my world represents
So now I walk a path in peace
So much joy to be released
Walking in prosperities
My soul to will a heart that’s pleased
Forego a blank tranquility
To live inside serenity
My dignity, my gentle strengths
Reflects my will’s tenacious lengths
- Nita Lee Marquez
IFBB Pro Fitness Athlete, Fitness Model, Fitness Personality, Author/Speaker/Fit Mom
I just don’t have the will power is a commonly heard phrase in fitness. Whether it’s a client, a fitness newbie, or someone who just explains why they refuse to even try getting fit.
Long ago, when we finished writing our book, FIT FOR COMBAT, my fitness co-author JD and I started cataloging what makes fitness, figure and bodybuilding competitors different from everyone else. Will power was at the top of the list. Will Power leads to self-discipline. When you want something badly enough, you will for it. In fitness, it’s no different. When you have the will for something, you CREATE the discipline to get what you want. If you want to be leaner, if you want to get into better shape, if you want to compete, or if you just want to be more active and feel more fit, will power is the doorway that leads you into manifestation of that goal.
It makes sense that self-discipline and will power would play a role in being able to stick to the diet and training program required to get into competition shape. We initially thought it would be the real difference between those who succeed in mastering their bodies and everyone else. As we studied what self-discipline really is, we realized that we had fallen into a common trap that social scientists call fundamental attribution error.
Every person has a reservoir of will power to draw on, like a will power battery, but the amount in that reservoir is not fixed at a set level. Research, by Professor Roy Baumeister at Florida State University, shows that our will power battery can be depleted by repeated acts of self control and decision making. Newer research by professors at the University of Chicago shows that our reservoir of will power is affected by whether we think there is a set amount of it or that it is unlimited.
The classic experiment by Baumeister, which has been replicated in hundreds of variations, asked student test subjects to eat radishes while being tempted with a plate of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. Baumeister then asked the students to solve an impossible puzzle. The students did not know the puzzle was impossible to solve.
The real purpose of the experiment was to see how long the students who had to overcome the temptation of the cookies would work at solving the puzzle when compared to students who sat down, ate some cookies and then worked on the puzzle and a control group who just worked on the puzzle with no cookies or radishes involved. The results show that the students who had to overcome the cookie temptation gave up on the puzzle quickly. Their battery of will power and resolve was depleted by fighting the temptation to eat the cookies. The students who had to overcome the cookie temptation, used up their reservoir of will power, their reservoir of resolve, and gave up on the puzzle in less than half the time of the other two groups and made far fewer attempts to solve the puzzle. Baumister calls this effect ego depletion. The experiment shows that when we use will power for one thing, overcoming the temptation of a cookie, it drains a little of that energy from the battery making it harder to exercise the will in totally unrelated things like trying to solve a puzzle.
Baumeister showed the energy depletion of decision making in an experiment where students, prior to working on the impossible puzzle, were either forced to make a decision about a task or were assigned a task. The students who had to make the decision gave up on the puzzle faster and made fewer attempts to solve than the students who just carried out an assignment.
So, in fitness, we note that a general 9-5 lifestyle tends to lead to the attitude that “I just don’t have time” or “By the time I get home at night, I don’t want to eat a chicken breast and salad. I just want a quick snack, a TV and a bed.”
In our fitness data research, JD and I found that most people have a lot of power. However, most people’s will power is just all used up with the demands of their jobs, running a household and raising two young girls. Every act of will power, every decision, drains the battery a little bit more, but the battery is not fixed, it is rechargeable and we can have more will power if we want it, just by thinking we have it.
The point being that, Yes, You Do have the Will Power! You are just in need of a budget of your will power! It’s about management of your energy resources, and not about your lack of energy. For fitness, you do have the energy, yet, you have been lacking knowledge. Gaining more fitness knowledge, working out to gain awareness of your body, and learning to listen to your body’s language in terms of what to feed it to stimulate energy is the only real way to go. You can stop blaming your will power for your fitness disasters or your state of health and wellness. The key I have found as a mother, is that fit moms have just learned how to start managing the will power better.
When JD and I first thought will power was the difference between the physique competitors and everyone else, we were making a fundamental attribution error, an error that is endemic among humans. Fundamental attribution error is when we use a psychological or personality based explanation for a behavior instead of the situational explanation. We were too focused on the personality trait of will power and thought that the competitors must have larger reservoirs of mental energy—a bigger battery. When we went back and studied Baumeister in depth, we found a better, situational, explanation for the seemingly large reservoirs of will power of the competitors.
Fitness, figure and bodybuilding competitors are cooler toters, especially when preparing for a contest. Their meals are planned and timed and they carry them around with them. They know what they are going to eat and when they are going to eat it. It is all scheduled and becomes a routine. When something becomes a routine it no longer involves a decision. When it is no longer a decision, it does not require any mental energy.
The physique competitors did not have a larger battery of will power than everyone else, they just used less will power by making many decisions about eating a routine. It was easier for them to stick to the diet because the decisions that take mental energy were removed. The situation, the eating plan to get into contest shape, makes them just appear to have more will power.
When we started looking at the lives of successful physique competitors they nearly all had a structured daily or weekly routine. The diet and training demands precision, the only way to be that precise is with a pre-determined structure. Once the structure and routine is set, there were fewer decisions to be made leaving more in battery to handle temptations as the cropped up.
Most fit moms have figured out the secret. Women tend to be better planners, but that’s not limited to women only, just happens to be a general statistic. What I see in fitness and in the general population of fitness enthusiasts is that fitness minded individuals plan what they’ll eat and make it a routine. With those decisions removed, people are then expending less will power and found that they had more energy. Most of these fitness people and fit moms have ready-made forms of protein around their house, in their car and at their office. JD and I found that common possessions among the successful fitness enthusiasts included powdered whey protein, shaker bottles, water gallons, tuna packs, and pre-cooked skinless/boneless chicken, among the most common possessions. Even if routine is disrupted, there is always an automatic back-up that did not require a decision, like an apple and a can of tuna or a ready to drink protein shake. And of course, every one of them owns some kind of fat-loss grill for their chicken and fish
Removing will-power draining decisions is one way women figure competitors maintain their diet, another is the actual nutritional content of the diet.
A lot of people never even try to get into their best shape because they think they don’t have the will power to do it. They make the fundamental attribution error and think the competitors have more will power than they do. As the research shows, if you don’t think you have very much will power, then you will not have much will power.
The only true act of will power was taking the time up front to set the schedule and routine. After repeating the routine it becomes automatic. Women figure competitors don’t have a larger reservoir of will power than everyone else, they just expend less of it by having a structured routine and fuel their brain with ketones from fat.
When single mothers have breakdown moments, especially all those who are striving to give healthy habits and heartfelt soul-growing examples to their children, tenacity is key. So when you feel down, I hope that you will join me in a community of spiritedness that encourages and empowers single mothers who are feeling overworked, overlooked, underappreciated, or often displaced. In fact, I hope that all women (and the men who care to understand and embrace us) will send out good vibes to one another through words and thoughts of encouragement and strength. A toast to the single mother!!! Since I don’t drink, I will toast to you with poetry! Remember you are worth the work. Take some time out go for a walk, do some lunges, read a book, or just sit and hug your family with every bit of energy you have left to do it with today/tonight. Be well, Be you, BE PHENOMENAL!!
THE FINAL TEST -Nita Lee Marquez
height of power
might of price
i wish i was
i wish they were
the pulse of faith
i can’t pay my bills, much less the rent
collectors call, the money’s spent
so call me lazy not selling out from nine to five
they can call me crazy as i struggle to strive
i do not concede to the statements they make
they shut me out hoping that i quake
i pray time is sure to recognize
the flickering behind my eyes
that fire sometimes feels drowned down
by tears that pour onto the ground
but in my heart i know i can
reach far passed their shrewd demand
they are hoping that i just might quit
remanding weakness cannot handle it
all i know when i go to sleep
is there’s a destiny i am meant to meet
they say i am a shameless woman of hate
they don’t know my life, so they can’t relate
they call me someone who should not be heard
and say my temperment is fiercely absurd
they refuse to see what i helped procure
but i do not care, cause i can self assure
there are no follies in this world
god made me a feisty little girl
there was a purpose for my path
even in my womanly wrath
i step unlightly but self-contained
explosively i still remained
they have not killed me, they gave me grit
to grow in strength through every hit
they kept me down to bring me up
god’s plan is never made corrupt
i smile with such delightful sighs
empowered now i continue to rise
in the time they spent to kill my dream
they never took away my steam
i need not ask for their regards
they answer god as they play the cards
these are words unspoken, but set in stone
i walk with god, i was never alone
i landed these battles as part of a plan
they are the championships on which i stand
and now i coast on a course of love
i love to own life and go above
yes, there are people who still antagonize
but now i pray for the flicker behind their eyes
i hope and know an ending blessed
life is just a bunch of tests
but either way, it never fails
god’s perfect plan always prevails!